About hate and anger

I really didn't want to post this, because I want to be a person who doesn't hate. But I am struggling with that and am confused why. So I decided to write about it. Maybe it will help me to get over it. I gave myself a love therapy session here earlier and it helped. So maybe this will too. But I warn you, it will be a rant. If you came here looking for something sophisticated, you won't find it here.

I'm far from perfect and apparently have  many insecurities that I'm trying to work on. In general I really like people. Many people inspire me and I want to learn from their good qualities and develop myself to become better. I want to see the good in people.

© Yle Areena: Au Pairit Los Angelesissa.

But sometimes I have a bad day and feel disappointed and it's just not that easy. And I catch myself thinking bad and unhelpful thoughts. For example, the other day, I was watching a Finnish reality TV show Au Pairit Los Angelesissa  ("Au pairs in Los Angeles"), and noticed that I thought that one of the girls had a terrible style. She wore a lot of really cakey make-up and spider-like fake lashes, and I just didn't like that type of make-up. But then I thought about it and realised how judgemental I was. She was a teenager which is the best time to try out absolutely any style! She clearly liked her style and it was the way she expressed herself — actually she was great and really smart! After that realisation she became my favourite person in the series. I absolutely hate the fact how quickly I judged her in the first place based on her appearance. Just because I personally wouldn't use some sort of make-up doesn't mean that there's something wrong with that style.

Maybe I was so quick to judge after I was bullied at school, which has made me nervous around certain kind of people. And suspicious about certain appearances. It's crazy and I should try to learn to be less judgemental. And I most definitely don't hate any of my bullies. I wouldn't even be able to name them if I had to.

But there are two people I still do hate. And I don't know what to do about that. So here I am to confess you everything about my unhelpful thoughts.

© Fab After Forty.

The first person really angers me. A few years ago, I was suffering from depression and was really lonely. I asked her if she would like to meet up for a cup of coffee with me sometime. We had previously spoken about that, so it wasn't out of the blue. Although, of course in UK you sometimes suggest meeting up when you don't really mean it. But still, I thought I'd ask because I really needed more pleasant activities in my day and a human to talk to. We were messaging about how we were doing and I was honest with her, about my anxiety and depression. She said that other people's company helps with that. So I asked her if she would like to meet me for coffee because at the time I didn't feel like I had other people I could just meet like that. And then she told me that I should just go to therapy and get professional help and take a gap year. And honestly, I had tried to get to therapy but the queue was 2 years long. It can be difficult for a healthy person to understand how difficult it is to find and get professional help for mental health issues. Often you have to be self-destructive to even get on the waiting list. But I didn't want her to be my therapist. I just wanted to have coffee with a real human being. I am still hurt and angry about that and I hate her. I hate her! And I don't know why. But I never told her how much her words hurt me. She's still my Facebook friend and she keeps posting really inconsiderate and self-boasting comments on Facebook. But maybe I am just so annoyed with everything she posts because I have such strong feelings about that incident and her. I have considered deleting her, but I'm not sure if that's the best solution. 

She reminds me of another person I used to hate. There was a similar incident around the same time, when I was really sad about having no one in my life. I was so depressed and slightly suicidal and I was crying at someone else's home, because I just didn't want to go home alone. And I was told to leave. And I wasn't even angry because I was told to leave. I completely understand how annoying it must have been to have me around that day. I was angry because she told someone who was crying and suicidal to go away. You should never do that. You take the time to make them a cup of tea. If you don't have time to listen to them, you tell them that they are welcome to stay as long as they need to, even if you are busy. Or you make other arrangements. You make sure they are okay to walk home. WHATEVER. Never, walk pass a crying lonely person, offer a tissue. Never leave a suicidal person alone. Would you walk pass a person ready to jump of a bridge? Would you kick out a suicidal person? If so, it's very likely that I will hate you.

©Quotes Lover.

At least for a moment. I don't actually hate her anymore, I don't have such feelings towards her, but I still haven't forgiven her for kicking out a suicidal person, even though I have forgiven her kicking out me.

The other person I notice myself hating hasn't actually done anything like that. She didn't invite me to her Hallowe'en party once, which is hardly a reason to even dislike someone. But I get these same angry and hateful feelings about her when I see things she posts on Facebook. (Because Facebook obviously is the place where the social things happen with people you don't actually see in real life anymore.) And I really used to like her. I've written a blog post in my less public blog about how much I missed her when I was on a summer holiday. And I used to be so happy to see her. But after that Hallowe'en party incident something changed and now everything about her annoys me. Do I need some therapy again? Or should I perhaps just delete her on Facebook and forget about her like she's forgotten about me?

©Rick Quotes.

Wow, I sound really shallow and bitter. I am not proud of this. I just want to let go so bad.

But yes, unfortunately, there are two people I still hate, but I am working on it. People suck and I need to accept it and get over it. This post really sucked. Maybe next time I'll tell you about people I love.

Year 2014 - spring!

Happy new year, guys!

... Okay, I admit that my plan was to do this post last month. But better late than never, eh?

I did a similar post last year and found it really therapeutic to say goodbye to the year 2013. So I think it's worth it to review what happened in my life in 2014 as well. Maybe it will remind me of my mistakes so that I can learn from then? And more importantly I can see what I've achieved last year so that I can be proud of it. And maybe after this it will be easier to focus on this year and the future.

This has potential to be a bit long, so I'm going to do this in two parts.

So what happened in spring 2014?

January

I welcomed the year 2014 in a small Finnish town with my friends. We stood on a muddy field with sparklers. I had bought myself a fancy new camera with objectives and everything for a Christmas present and had great intentions to learn to use it. 

We sailed to Stockholm with my friends and had a great day out in rainy and wintery Stockholm. When Reseda and Anna would sail back to Finland, Mayumi and I were supposed to catch an evening flight to London. But of course there were problems. We had locked our suitcases, passports and plane tickets into a locker at the ferry terminal. But we hadn't realised to check what time the ferry terminal would close and of course the place was empty and the doors were locked when we returned there to collect our luggage just before our train would leave to the airport. Fortunately, we managed to catch the security guard before he went home. It was his first day! Thankfully, he was lovely and helped us to get back into the building to get our stuff, and we made it back to UK in one piece.

Before travelling back up to Scotland I spent a couple of days in my favourite city, Oxford. I visited J.R.R. Tolkien's grave and just wandered around the familiar streets and felt nostalgic.

When we got back to Aberdeen, Mayumi and I decided to compare whether differently priced Jaffa cakes actually tasted any different. They did. The medium priced were the best ones.

February

In February the sun started shining and Aberdeen didn't seem quite as miserable anymore. I decided that I needed to do something with my life and to start living again. I started yoga. I applied for jobs. I got contact lenses. I travelled to a job interview in Glasgow — and for the first time in my life it was successful job interview! My favourite shop, Lush, was campaigning for equal love. We also had a lovely candlelit Valentine's double date night. Also, our flatmate's Japanese boyfriend was visiting and we organised a road trip to visit some Scottish castles.

March

In March, Satu and I visited Manchester, bought some Lush bath bombs and may have ended up having a bath wearing our party dresses after a wee exploration trip to Canal Street. 

I also went to another job interview, got offered another job and started working in Aberdeen. And that's how the era of riding buses began.

April

In April, I had a lot of early mornings which involved getting up at 3am and running out of the door to catch a my bus to work. Those mornings were made a lot better by our neighbourhood bunnies who ran down the street with me. I really loved living there! Working was exciting but commuting for 3 hours everyday was tiring and I started drinking a lot of coffee.

I had a wee holiday too! I travelled to London to go to #rosweglyn -event, to meet "role models for the next generation of gay girls", also known as, "One venue, a handful of YouTubers and 600 screaming lesbians". I was quite excited to go to this thing! I got to meet Kaelyn and Lucy, who I had been following for a long time! And it certainly didn't make it less exciting that two other lesbian youtuber couples: Wegan (Megan and Whitney) and The Roses (Rose and Rosie) were going to be there too. Because Youtube has become sort of like my best friend, I obviously have been watching their videos too. Unfortunately,  Rose ended up in hospital that morning and wasn't able to be there.

May

This was fairly work-orientated month. I took photos of animals I met on my way to work each morning. It was dark, so I'm sure you understand that my phone wasn't able to produce high-quality photos. But I was so happy about meeting these animals! In May, I also finally got paid and celebrated that by buying a new hand bag and eating some fancy Japanese-style food. I also moved to a new flat, and then back to the old flat because the new one sucked. I also got myself a pool and sauna membership to the new aquatics centre. It was so good for me to dip into a pool after a long day of work and then to relax in the sauna. It made such a difference! And afterwards I liked to go to the pub to get a glass of cheap champagne.

June

I enjoyed summer in my favourite neighbourhood and admired our local Pictish standing stones. Then I received some bad news from Finland and travelled to see my poorly cat. Jonna happened to be hosting a breastfeeding celebration party so I travelled to her village to spend time with her and my goddaughter and some friends. We also got a chance to explore my hometown's dangerous nightlife... The same night, there was someone trying to get into a nightclub with a scythe. I don't know why my mum thinks the rest of the world is dangerous, when this sort of thing happens when I visit home.

So that was the first half. Here's the second half.

Do you enjoy looking back to see what you have done last year? I think I've seen some apps on Facebook that do that for you without you needing to dig through your photo albums like I did for this post. Oh, and if you have written similar posts yourself, feel free to link them to me!

Even the fish keep swimming.

Hi!

Did you notice how silent it has been on my blog recently? There has of course been a good reason for it. 

I've started a new job. It has been very exciting. I'm so happy that I have a job now! But it has also been hard, and I've cried and I've been tired. During my work days, it's pretty much the only thing I do. I wake up, get ready, go to work, come home, eat and sleep.

I know, that for most of the living population it's normal to go to work and live a demanding life and never to have any freetime. But for a lot of people it's harder. I really hope that I will be successful in my new job, and don't end up quitting it because of stress or unhappiness or fatigue. So far in life I've learned that some things are just not worth it. Life is short, and if something is constantly making me unhappy, I'm not going to stick with it for any longer than necessary. I could always move to Thailand and start a beach cafe for tourists instead. Or to try something else.

No really, I am being serious! Once upon a time, I was going through a break-down thanks to uni stress and went travelling for a week. I then posted pictures of my trip on Facebook and got comments from an almost-stranger saying that I need to stop being so lazy and going travelling using my parents money, and instead I just need to get a job like everyone else. That person had no idea what I was going through. He didn't know that I didn't spend a penny of my parents money on my breathing break. He didn't know that I had sent hundreds of applications and not landed a job. And he didn't know how to be happy.

I want to learn how to be happy. I want to work somewhere where I enjoy working. I want to earn money and spend it on things that make me happy. I want to travel and see the world.  And I really hope that the job I have now will be one that I will enjoy.

We're also looking for a new flat closer to my work, and hopefully also closer to university, where Laura studies. At the moment it takes me 1½ hours to get to work, and I have to take two buses, which don't have a great on-time record. They've also occasionally just broken down, when I'm trying to go somewhere. So if we would find a good flat somewhere where I can just take one bus to work, I think I could live a lot more stress-free life.

I'm also dreaming of having a bath. That's probably the only thing I miss in our current flat. I love all the bunnies, central heating, living room, kitchen big enough to cook in, backyard, patio and shed... Maybe I'll do a post showing our current flat before we move out. And if we don't find a good flat at a good location, we will probably have to get a car.

How has your life been recently? Feeling the spring yet?

I'm a traveller.

Hello!

Remember my "...andthatswhoiam" -posts? They can be found under the tag being myself. I used them as a method of therapy, because I struggled with situations when I had to introduce myself or tell someone about myself. It clearly helped because I actually went to a job interview last Friday!

But I haven't actually shown you all the pictures that I chose from that website last autumn! So now I'm going to tell you a little bit more about myself.

I love travelling. I want to see everything. I feel like the best thing to spend your money on is to travel and see all the different places and meet people who come from different backgrounds than you do. It will widen your views and help you grow as a person. You will get memories that you'll never forget. It will help you become less materialistic and you'll start to appreciate your experiences more.

Travelling has probably always been my favourite thing to do. I'm from a small town, but it does have a travel agency. I used to go there and carry a copy of all of their brochures home. I loved looking at all the pictures and dreaming of all the places I could go to.  Unfortunately, my mum's idea of travelling was to catch a ferry to Sweden, and to stay on it and head back home straight away, without even setting a foot on the ground. Once I was old enough to travel, I cached one of those ferries and went to see what Sweden really looked like.

I'm the exploring kind of traveller. I find it hard to just do what the tourist guide book tells me. I want to find out things myself. I might go to the tourist information to get a map, in case I get lost (which unsurprisingly happens quite a lot), but my favourite activity is to just wander around aimlessly in a new city. I've never been on a beach holiday, because I think I'd find it difficult to just lie there getting burned, when I could be exploring all the suspicious side alleys and getting to know some interesting local people.

Did I ever mention that I'm a big Doctor Who fan? How many TARDIS-themed things have you noticed on my blog? The whole concepts of being able to travel through space and time really fascinates me. There must be more out there. And there is a reason why I ended up with a degree in Archaeology. But I'm stuck in this time and our planet. Which really isn't that bad after all. Exciting things are happening in our time, with all the digitalisation and equality movements. Scary and awful things are happening too, and there are many places I don't even want to travel to at the moment thanks to their political situation. But there's still at least half a planet left which I could and would like to explore.

I strongly believe that understanding the language of the place you travel to helps you get more out of the trip. The more you understand the language the more you understand the culture. And vice versa. Travelling is also the key to learning languages. When you need to find a Burger King in Spain, you suddenly can understand those instructions in Spanish. Or at least I found my way to the Burger King. I also learned to pronounce it the Spanish way.

I've never been to Asia, but I've got really interested in Japanese, Korean and Chinese cultures recently. I thought that Japanese might be the easiest Asian language for me to learn first, so now I've started planning a trip to Japan. It will happen once I feel that I've learned enough Japanese to get the most out of that trip!

I have a funny feeling that the only reason why I've watched all of the Lord of the Rings and the Hobbit films is the fact that they are shot in New Zealand. That's one place I would really love to travel to. Originally, I wanted to spend an exchange year there, but it never happened. It's the furthest place on Earth I could travel to, which probably makes it even more exciting.

I have lived in a couple of different countries. I've lived in England and Germany for a month, and in Finland and Scotland for years. All of those countries have a place that feels like a home to me. Sometimes I meet people in Scotland who hear that I'm a foreigner and ask me "so where's home?" They think it's a cunning way to phrase the question: "where are you from?", but I always find it a little bit insulting. Do they mean I'm not welcome here, and want me to go back where I came from? I don't want to go back. I want to find a place I belong. The question is also difficult, because I find Scotland to be my home just as much as Finland is. I'm from Finland but I live here now. And I'm not sure where I want to move next. 

But okay, my home is in Europe. For now at least.

Finnish people don't make friends easily, which is kind of a problem. I have, however, met amazing people from all over the world. I wish I'd find it more natural to open up to people and actually make life-long friends and to stay in touch more.

I've always thought that the best cure for depression is to go travelling. I've never felt sad or depressed while travelling. Everything in this world is just too amazing, to feel depressed. Depression is like being stuck. If you don't realise that you're free to go and do anything, you will feel depressed. If you ever feel suicidal, just sell everything you own and use that money to go travelling. As far as possible, and you might find the reason to live again.

I love learning to get to know this planet. I want to explore my options before I decide where I want to settle down to. I feel that there's no point feeling miserable with my life, if I don't want to go and see how people live elsewhere. Maybe there's a place that is more suitable for me than the place where I'm now? And if not, there's nothing better than that feeling of coming back home.

P.S. Here's a map of the places I've conquered so far.

It's fairly Western Europe centred so far, but I'm working on it.

I pinned these places on the TripAdvisor app on Facebook. And then I mangled it a little bit on Paint, because I hate the way Google Maps stretch the North. Unfortunately this app doesn't have all the places I've been to. I'm especially sad that North Rona is missing. But according to this app, I've visited 17 countries, which is 13% of the world. That sounds like a good start!

I honestly, don't know where I'm going next. But I like to keep my options open.

Does photo quality matter?

I've been getting really stressed out about cameras recently. 

I've always enjoyed taking photos. When I was in primary school, I had a film camera. I was able to take 24 photos － sometimes 25 or even 26 if I was lucky! － before I had to take them to the photo shop to get them developed. In 2004, I got my first Nokia camera phone as confirmation gift. I used it to take some cat photos and random selfies that I could put on IRC-galleria, the online site the Finns used to use before Facebook. But I still took all holiday photos with my lovely film camera. After I got back from a language course in Oxford I took 8 film rolls to the photo shop. The lady who worked thought it was a lot. The times have changed. Imagine if almost 200 photos from an adventure-filled holiday was still a lot!

We visited Paris on the way home from Oxford.

In 2007 I got my first digital camera as a present. I still used my film camera a lot though, and normally took both of them with me when I went somewhere. I have several albums filled with photographs from all of my adventures. But nowadays all of my photos (well not all but some of the best ones) just get uploaded on Facebook. That's the only place where I have some of them, thanks to Microsoft Support that deleted them from my hard drive.

Fitting room mirrors have been handy whether I've been using a film camera or a camera phone.

But I really love taking photographs. They help me remember all the fun things I've done and amazing people I've met. I feel like photographs keep me together. My memory has been very bad recently and it has really helped that I'm able to look back in time in form of photographs, and that way being able to remember things that I would have otherwise forgotten. I might be a completely different person if I hadn't had a camera all of those times, because I wouldn't be able to remember them!

I've used a digital camera i.a. at Avebury, Aberdeen University and Stirling Castle.

  

What's the point of going on a holiday if you can't take photos to remind you of the sunny days when you sit at home and it's raining outside?

Birthday time!

Hi!

There's this thing that happens every year that is a good excuse to have a fun day. It's when we finally get to tell people how old we actually are. And then for the rest of the year you are expect to round down to that number. Last Sunday I finally reached the age of 24,00 years, and many people wished me to have a fun day and and a wonderful year. It was amazing to see so many people write on my Facebook wall just to wish me a happy birthday! And to get some text messages and cards too.

So, I thought I'd tell you how I spent that day!

This picture is not foggy, it's just demonstrating how sleepy we felt on the bus.

Obviously, the day started by getting woken up by a beautiful girl to realise that it was my birthday and that I was wearing a ball dress. That's how birthday's should start right? No need to do anything to your face because, magically, your make-up is already on, and a fairy godmother enchanted you into a fabulous dress.

Well, okay, I had come home from a Dance Festival's after party 5 hours earlier and fallen asleep on the sofa in full gear. That's what three glasses of vodka sometimes does to you.

But it was all okay, and I had a shower and got ready, and then Laura and I jumped on a bus and headed to cinema to watch Nativity 2: Danger in Manger!.

It has two of my favourite actors in it: David Tennant and Joanna Page.

Just watching David Tennant makes me happy, but adding Joanna Page, cute kids singing funny Christmas songs and a real donkey made it absolutely worth it to get up early and go see it at 10am.

Cinema!

After watching the film about a bunch of kids travelling to Wales, we headed to an Irish pub in town. I had booked a table, but we had some confusion with the name it was under. But after we realised that instead of Tia-Maria, the table was reserved for Tia Mallo - we found our table. Because obviously many people want to book a table in an Irish pub at the opening time on a Sunday.

I got some presents! It was very exciting.

What is round and has a trunk? I bet you'll never guess what this is.

There's also this film clip of me looking at a present. I tried to add some subtitles too, because the pub was a bit noisy. I hope the video works.

I've never tried to edit an video, because I've always thought it's very difficult, and haven't even tried because I've been too scared of embarrassing myself. Maybe I'll try one day, if I get a camera I can film with.

I got a text message from a mystery person, letting me know that he couldn't make it.

Then there was food! Laura and I had half a burger each, because we had taken our breakfast to the cinema and weren't super-hungry yet. But Liz was hungrier.

The Ultimate Burger.

She ordered an Ultimate Burger. This is what you get in pubs when you feel very hungry. It has everything you can order in a pub in one burger.

But no one knows how it's meant to be eaten.

After lunch we went ice skating, but unfortunately there's no pictures from there, because everyone was silly enough to leave our camera phones in the car. But it was fun to get on ice again! I would like to go there again soon. Would anyone like to come with me? I'll try and take some pictures next time too!

It was a fun day! It wasn't a super-amazing party, but I got to eat a lot, and I got lots of eating related things as a present: frying pan, pancake mix, maple syrup, bowls and chopsticks! I also got to spend time with awesome people and to laugh and practise my favourite sport! 
And by favourite, I mean the only one I like.

Keeping boobs close to heart

Two days ago I got really excited about a new bra I found online! In this blog post I will tell you why a piece of underwear made me so excited. So bra-talk coming up! I've meant to write about this topic for a long time, but have always decided not to. Last time I posted about bras online it got judged by a group of my classmates as "fucking stupid".

But today, I decided not to care about my fears and people who judge talking about these things as "too personal". This is actually a fairly important topic because for many people this particular piece of clothing might be the most important part of their outfit. It prevents unnecessary pain, allows us to move smoothly, makes us feel more confident, and some of them can be really pretty too. In this blog post I will provide some bra-fitting advice and explain how the sizing works, which might help some of you, if you're struggling to find comfortable bras.

If you are over-sensitive about this topic, you might want to skip this blog post. Or if you really must, you're welcome to leave an angry comment.

Made in Preston Blog.

So, the other day, I was online and noticed a link to Made in Preston's website on Thin and Curvy blog's Facebook page. Made in Preston is an UK store that makes "fitted fashion for bigger boobs". They sell tops, dresses, swimming costumes and underwear. They have three different shapes of all their clothes to fit different size boobs. That's really brilliant! And they make bras in 26-back size! Now they only have two different styles available: Winter Punk Lace and Winter Brights. They make both styles from 26DD to 26J (and up to 38GG, but that's not the big news here).

Why do I think this is great news? Because I have never seen bras in 26 back size sold anywhere. And I've often wished they'd make it when I've had to leave a bra in the shop because the band wasn't tight enough for my ribcage. There really is a market for 26 back size bras. I'm sure if Made in Preston keeps making these bras, they will sell worldwide.

But why would someone spend so much money on bras, when you can get some in Tescos? Well, the most important thing about bras, is not to cover our boobs. Some of them - for some reason it sometimes feels like that most bras available in my size - are see through, and really don't. For instance, Freya's Lyla bra.

Freya Lyla Lingerie.

But what do Freya bras do then? They fit and give support. As long as you pick the right size. And based on my personal experience of the world, most girls wear the wrong size. And no, I did not go and check what the bra labels of people that I meet say, I have just gone bra shopping with some of my friends. I really enjoy going bra shopping. And seriously, one of the best things that ever happened to my boobs was, when one of my friends took me bra shopping for the first time. Having a supportive bra makes such a difference!

From what I've seen, people seem to be very shy about underwear and would rather buy it without needing to try them on, but unfortunately you can't do that if you want to make sure that the bra you're spending your money on will be worth any of that money for you. To make this even trickier, most high street clothes stores, such as, H&M, New Look, Primark, etc. only do a very limited range of bra sizes. Some lucky ones are able to buy their underwear there (it's cheaper!), but many unlucky people believe that they can get bras that fit them but in fact their size is something completely different. Some places offer a "bra fitting service", but they are unfortunately not reliable, as they most of the time will only offer you the closest fit from the bras that they have. Cheryl from Invest in Your Chest blog undertook a High Street Fitting Challenge, where she visited several high street shops and tried out their bra fitting services to see what bras they would suggest her. The results where shocking, as most fitters appeared to have no clue of what a well-fitting bra even looks like.

When you go looking for a bra that fits you perfectly, you can start anywhere that sells bras and has a fitting room, but your best bet is in a store that stocks a wide range of sizes. And no - a shop that does cup sizes from A to D, is not one of them. Even if you're used to wearing a bra sized 34B, like I used to, it doesn't mean that a shop with that range has a bra that will fit you. Most people need a tighter band than they wear, and when you go down in a band size, you need a bigger cup size. Cup sizes are not "static", they are dependant on the band size. 30D looks completely different from 38D.

Band size is represented with a number. It's the measurement you get when you measure the circumference underneath your boobs. It's a good guideline if you have no idea what you're correct bra size is, but you still need to try on bras to find out which one fits you best. 

If you're using a measuring tape in inches, the number you measure is the actual band size. If you're measuring tape is in centimetres, you need to take 12 centimetres off the measurement you get.

Cup size is represented with a letter. The letter is calculated alphabetically, and it's the difference between your band measurement and bust measurement. If the difference is 1 inch, you're an A cup, if it's 2 inches, you're a B cup. In different countries the cups are calculated slightly differently, but commonly in UK they are counted: 

AA, A, B, C, D, DD, E, F, FF, G, GG, H, HH, J, JJ, K, KK, L. 

There are doubles for some letters, and I is skipped completely. AA is the only cup that is smaller than A, all the other doubles are bigger than the single.

If you're measuring in centimetres, you need to compare the original measurements - don't use your band measurement to compare the cup sizes. Instead of 1 inch, each cup size is 2cm bigger than previous one. Note that, 1 inch is not the same measurement and that when you get to bigger cup sizes, European cupsizes don't respond to UK sizes well.

Freya Lingerie.

Trying to find a bra that fits perfectly can be challenging if you've never owned a bra that fits before. It's easiest if you have a friend who help you, but as the above example shows, shop assistants might not be trustworthy. But if you follow this guide, you can check whether the bra you're trying on fits or not.

1. Hook the bra to the loosest hook, and check how many fingers you can get underneath the band. If it's more than 2, go and get a smaller back size. 

If this is the first time you're trying on a bra that size it will feel very tight. You will get used to it, but if you wish you may buy the next size up - but buy only one because soon you will probably want to buy the smaller band size.

2. Once you're band is tight enough, look at the band and wires between your boobs. They should rest tightly against your ribcage. This time you should not be able to get any fingers underneath the band (in the front). If the wires are not resting against you, you will need to go up a cup size.

3. To check whether the cups are the right size, you first need to make sure that all of your breast tissue is in the cup. Then make sure you're not bulging out from the sides or from the top. No part of the cup is meant to dig in to you. 

Many girls wear too small cup sizes in order to get a "push up" effect. Please don't do that. It actually only makes your boobs look smaller. Get a bra that is the correct size and just stick silicone cushions in there that are meant to make the effect. Or socks. Everyone has socks. It will be a lot more comfortable, you will look better and your boobs will thank you.

4. If you're bra otherwise fits well, it's time to adjust the bra straps. You may have had to do this a little bit before this step, because it's impossible to try on a bra with super tight bra straps. Now it's time to make sure they are snug, but not too tight.

Many people who wear the wrong bra size, believe that the support in the bra comes from the straps, when it actually should come from the band. When you're band is tight enough, you don't really even need the straps. If you're bra does not stay where it should be when you take the straps off, you're bra is not the right size.

5. Does your bra still not feel right? You might be trying on a bra that's the wrong style for you. There are loads of different bra styles such as full cup, demi cup, balconette and plunge. Depending on your boobs' shape, some of them might not fit you, but most likely something will. You just need to be brave and actually try on different styles!

I visited Tallinn like I said I would!

I hope this helps someone, because finding out how bras are supposed to feel has really changed my life and improved my self-confidence. The sad part of finding out my actual bra size was that there actually are very few bras made in my size, which is exactly why I wanted to share the Made in Preston bra on Facebook, so that other thin and curvy women, could find out about it as well.